I'm not pessimistic, I believe in living life to the fullest each and every moment of it. Planning all the tours so well in advance, how can I miss my final journey. Death. Second biggest event of Life, after Birth. Death should be a celebration, like celebrating farewells. When I took my first breath, I become entitled to stop somewhere. Given the fact that nobody has survived beyond a certain limit of time... It's inevitable.
Some live longer some live shorter, some live knowing the fate, some live fearing the end. It's their for everyone yet everyone wants to run away from it... Each passing moment is taking us closer to it, Running away is in fact becomes the act of getting closer and closer. These thoughts become stronger when you are alone. That's why those who are occupied with daily chorus feel less about the "certain thing". Stronger the life-support, stronger the desire to live. Stronger is the denial of final certainty. As one poet has said.. "Miles to go before I sleep..." Everyones wants to wake up and cover the distance called Life; full of responsibilities. Certainly everyone thinks pondering about Death is pessimism. Who are you fooling? It's not pessimism, when you can debate and put your thoughts on the meanest of subjects.. why not Death? It's the fear that stops you. When you accept it as part of life it becomes much easier to imagine.
I know, I'm going to die, may be much earlier than what I thought it would happen. Owing to a lifestyle, I stand no chance of survival beyond 60 years. Reaching 60 itself will be a lifetime achievement. As I'm thinking about it, I may make few changes here and there and prolong it for few more years but eventually I will breath my last someday. KNOWING THIS FACT I CANT EXPRESS THE JOY OF BREATHING AT THIS VERY MOMENT. It's the thing that got us started, keeps us going on and will put us to a halt one day. Sighhh.. while writing this I unknowingly took a deep breath.
So how would that moment be when my life comes to a halt? I wish it happens when I'm in deep sleep dreaming of best moments I had. Moments when I felt most alive, like the one when I was chanting "Sachin Sachin" to the top of my voice when Master Blaster played his last 200th test match at Wankhede Stadium. Moments spent with family and friends, and with little ones. Remebering their selfless sweet smiles. I will be thankful if it happens early morning before the sunrise, before the dawn. As I dont like waking up early morning, let that be the time- I never have to ever again. Let everyone gather who wants to meet and let me be on my final ride before the sunset. Like I said, it should be a celebration. No one should cry, miss me silently if you wish to but no shedding tears. Celebrate it with colors. The dress-code for my funeral should strictly be informal.. The best could be Goan style. Shirts and shorts with flower prints, hats of different styles, and carefree attitude... like we all have when we visit Goa. No whites strictly no whites. And I don't want to get carried away in sleeping posture. I have slept enough in my lifetime, so when I go, put me in a Car, seated; in the Navigator seat (and put a map in my hands of the funeral location) and have one of my best friend drive the Car. Needless to say, play songs of MJ(Earth Song), Bob Dylan(Blowin in the wind), Bob Marley(Every little thing gonna be all-right), Nusrat Sahab(Sanu ek pal chain na aave), Lataji(Khamosh sa afsana), Pink Floyd(Time), Nirvana(Man who sold the world), Kishor Kumar (Ye jeena hai angoor ka dana...), Sonu(Abhi Muzh me kahi), Arijit Singh(Phir le laya dil), Lucky Ali(Anjani rahon me) and lastly Metallica(Nothing Else Matters). I deliberately wrote this because Music makes the life worth living and its my wish to play it on my last ride.
When the ride reaches the destination, have a welcome for the body, burst few crackers, have a DJ blaring Pitbull & David Guetta songs. Let the cremation begin, I wish its old style pyre... as I have always enjoyed the journey more than the destination... want this too, to be slow and enjoyable. As the sun sets, let the flames reach the sky. Have return gifts for the guests, preferably copies of Bhagavad Gita with posters written in bold letters, "ASATO MA SAD GAMAYA, TAMASO MA JYOTIRGAMAYA" and songs of my last playlist.
Is that all? Yes it is. We cant write our own scripts but we are optimistic humans, we never cease to dream...doesn't matter if it's about life or about death.
I'm feeling light hearted for no reason having written all that. Don't know what hidden emotions pushed me thus far to write all this for no reason, on a cool, breezy, drizzly, relaxing, monsoon weekend morning... Just sipped a hot cup of tea and went on writing...
-Ciao
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